Monday, May 25, 2015

Fumigation Tents of Florida

I suppose they do this everywhere, but I honestly have never seen these things until I landed in Interzone. In order to fumigate your home, pest control companies as a last resort try to de-bug a hopelessly infested building by covering it in an enormous rubber tent that looks like a circus Big Top.

When you encounter one for the first time, especially if it's a really huge one, it's quite the mind-blower. For me, it was a chilling experience something akin to the moment the teens discovered the alien clowns' giant spaceship-tent in the middle of the woods in Killer Klowns From Outer Space.

I don't really understand the concept. The people have to go live in a hotel or something while the poison gas fills the house for a few days, then somehow the pest control guys just come out and take the tarp off and declare it "all clear" and you just go back home again? Isn't everything inside still covered with poisonous residue? And where does the poison gas go? When they take the giant tarp off, doesn't a giant cloud of the poison come wafting out? And can you really tell me one of these rubber house-sized tarps has never ever leaked? What must the neighbors be thinking when they look out the window and see this shit? And don't some poisoned insects ever manage to crawl out of the house and out into the environment before they die? Wouldn't there be vast underground networks of ant colonies under entire neighborhoods carrying these toxins all over the place?

I'm not into the pesticide scene at all, so if I ever had a house that got this infested with termites, roaches, bedbugs, whatever, I'd probably just burn the place down and start over.

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